Friday, June 05, 2009

Hi, my name is Zombie Mom.


You know her.

Maybe you are her.

She's the woman who slides out of bed while leaving barely an imprint of herself in the bed. She fights with the eye boogey that has attached itself to the top AND bottom eyelash. And prays that the toothpaste is really toothpaste and not husband's shaving cream.

The eye boogey has been washed out with remnants of water and traces of toothpaste left on fingers. Searing pain still does not wake her fully.

And stumbles out of the bathroom.

She dresses.

She looks in mirror. With one eye.

She re-dresses as her yoga pants are on backwards.

She answers the pleas of Juuucee & Eat.

The toddler of the Zombie mother has already gotten up. And has already lined all toys out on the floor from front door to her bedroom.

Toddler has the energy that defeats the family of the energizer bunnies and wants Zombie mom on full attention.

All before a decent cup of coffee.

Do you know her?


25 ramblings of your own:

Sapphire said...

Yes, her name is Sapphire!!!!

Housewife Savant said...

I pity her. She's a wreck.
She should be me, living large, on 8 hours (or else) and coffee ALWAYS before human interaction (or else).
Is it too early to teach the toddler "or else"? cuz that would help.

Funny in My Mind said...

That's me. I have no toddlers. Anymore. It's work and a new puppy and laundry calling me.

Unknown said...

She's right here... and today she decided to put her hair in a clip instead of brushing it.

OneZenMom said...

Intimately. :)

Cammie said...

why do I feel like I know this person. Hmmmm, oh yes. It IS me.

Christina - Rant Rave Roll said...

Sounds like you were peeking in my windows!!

Controlling My Chaos said...

I think that was me about five years ago. I remember CLEARLY feeling so tired that I was willing to die to get some sleep.

Mrs. M said...

Sounds like we are all a bunch of clones of this person!! ;-)

Life, Love And Lola said...

All of my mom friends could be her twin.

Unknown said...

since my boy has entered the "i need to be clean for the girls" phase he wants to be woken up every day @ 0630am so he can shower.

so i set my alarm and then yell his name until he gets up cuz i want that extra half hour to sleep.

i am such an awesome mom.

for realz.

andy:)

Vivienne @ the V Spot said...

Except for the eye boogey, it's me.

AiringMyLaundry said...

I know her well.

Dang those eye boogeys.

Anonymous said...

Lol! How do kids have endless energy first thing in the morning??

OliveStreetStudio said...

Unfortunate thing, I know her all too well. Wish I didn't!!

jineen said...

i have to say i don't know that woman so much anymore since i work nights:) my husband stays home right now and so HE is zombie dad:) but i feel for you....the toy thing, i think it must be something they learn in utero....mine still does that and he is 7!

Shawn said...

Not a morning person. NOT a morning person.

So, I hear you!

Kalei said...

I love that cartoon. I totally have dreams like that, then I wake up because it makes me think i "overslept" then I look at the clock and I only slept for 2-3 hours. Then I can't go back to sleep cause the baby wakes up....or....something..... =)

rachaelgking said...

I have so much to look forward to...

:-)

jodi said...

very cute post ;)

Anonymous said...

I definitely know her.

Sometimes I am her too.

Good luck.

mo.stoneskin said...

You've brushed your teeth with shaving cream? Did it do the job?!

I'd quite like to shave with toothpaste, you know the nice minty freshness would be quite refreshing...

Unknown said...

Oh dear I am nuttin without my coffee! Cute Blog!

pan x 8 said...

I am her in every way, shape, and form. I think I've been her for the last 10 years and hopefully in the next few years, I can at least leave an imprint in my bed!

Anonymous said...

Yes, thats me everyday!