Thursday, March 05, 2009

Mayday, Mayday....

It's an aircraft in trouble.

"I can't keep it up anymore!"

"You have to. I see our final destination!"

"Captain, please, I see a possible closer landing spot! The pleasantly plumped mother who just fell asleep with her hand in a bucket of movie theater butter popcorn."

"So be it. God help us."

***************

And THAT is how the thing that is a disgusting piece of distraction for others came between my two eyebrows. While my 13 year old neighbor is walking around outside flaunting his baby smooth skin!

Yes, Mr. Office Depot guy. I know. You didn't have to recoil when I turned to you in response to your chipper "Did you need any assistance...OH.MY.GOD.....I, uh, sorry,uh this way to accordion file folders."

Yes, Miss Fabric Mart woman. It can be hypnotizing. But for the love, ring up my fabrics, let me pay you, and me and the Zitmiester will be on our way.

Yes, Lil Rambler. It is "Oowie"

And thank you Woof Woof. For trying to lick my wounds.

17 ramblings of your own:

Anonymous said...

Poor, Poor, Rambler.
Let me come to your house and take care of you. Margarita, perhaps?. . .Oh Darn, I live too far away to come to your aid...I'll drink a Margarita in your behalf, cause for sure, "You've had a BAD day!"... I wouldn't be a good Southern Gal if I didn't remind you that a little Visine will remove a lot of the redness, then you want to follow up with a bit of "cover-up stick" before you go out into the general public, as someone may suggest the police come to arrest your husband for abuse.

Christina - Rant Rave Roll said...

Thank you! It's nice to know that I am not the only one who ends up with a zit on my face... mine always lie in hiding and them jump out with a beackon light calling 'Look at me! Look at me!'. I hate it... grown woman in her 30's with a zit.. lovely

Unknown said...

I'm Zitty McZitterson right now as well, glad I am not the only one!

Unknown said...

And I thought my tit zit was bad. At least I could squish my boobs together and hide it. Maybe if you frowned real hard you could conceal it in the folds of your forehead wrinkles?

Alexis AKA MOM said...

You all just crack me up! I hope it gets better ;)

Brittany said...

Bless your heart! I, too, can get monster, stress zits. Thank you, Cortisol.

Lagirl is correct... Visine can do wonders!

Also, before bed, wet a Q-Tip with VERY hot water and touch it to zit for 30 seconds. Then, apply benz. peroxide or salicylic acid. The hot water will help absorb the meds.

Hang in there... or make a new friend! He'll be with you a couple of days!!! :)

Muppet Soul said...

HA!

Sorry to laugh at your pimple. Your pimple is very serious, but it makes me giggle.

I, myself, get the annual Christmas pimple. smack dab in the middle of my forehead, every year, just in time for pictures.

It's my little Christmas miracle.

I am sending you positive skin thoughts.

DAMN the cashier who stares at you. DAMN HER.

Muppet Soul said...

PS - I left you a silly little award on my blog.

Anonymous said...

Brittany's comment was both helpful and amusing. I had to laugh at the "make a friend" comment. Alas, those are the kind of friends you don't want hanging around.

A glass of wine and some good chocolate are called for in this situation!

Hope your "friend" gets the message that he's overstayed his visit and get the hell outta Dodge soon!

Saskia said...

It's nice to know I'm not the only one! My mother PROMISED that after my teenage years my skin would be better. It is better, but only marginally... grrr! Having a fringe does hide a multitude of sins!

Saskia x

Loud Spirit said...

At least you don't work with Ying Peng. I work with her - here in Kansas - so I know she isn't there. The woman has NO FILTER between her brain and her mouth (I love her for this actually...except..)

When I was sick those three weeks - everytime I ran a fever I got a cold sore. One day last week she was just openly staring at me and I was thinking, "Oh gawd...what is she going to say"...

"What wrong with your mouth?" (spoken with a heavy asian accent - it sounds like, "WHAT wong wif yowr mouf?") Then she lifted her finger to within an inch of my latest addition to be sure I knew what she was talking about.

Maybe she is related to Mr. Office Depot guy.

Me (aka Danielle) said...

You poor thing! I just don't understand why after all we endure as mothers we must also have to deal with acne as if we were still teenagers!

Kalei said...

hhahahahahhoahaoaaaha rolllling in my bathtub!!!!!! use soap. =)

Kim said...

Make a game out of him...see if you can hit the mirror with the Zitmeister...when given lemons...lol.

MammaDucky said...

I have no solution for the "owie" issue. I do, however, have a suggestion for 13 yr old Captain Perfect Face. What you need is a BB gun, or small pain pellet gun. Just shoot the little bugger in the cheek or forehead, thus creating a small welt! Ha ha! No more perfect face for you buddy!
Is that wrong?

Carebear said...

LOLOL... sorry to laugh at your "owie" but this IS funny! I can feel your pain. I had beautiful skin as a teenager, then suddenly in my twenties started breaking out regularly. When I was still teaching, there were days that I was had the worst skin in a room of thirty tenth-graders! Good luck getting rid of it ASAP!

Leanna said...

Yea, well, I hate to be the one to give you the bad news...it gets NO better in your 40's! WTH is up with all that, eh?

ROFL!! The only thing you can do is either go underground, into hiding OR act like you don't have a clue what they are staring at!