Wednesday, April 01, 2009

Some drunk person could benefit from my kid's diaper bag.

So I'm at work the other day and my staff and I were chit chatting.

Drunk story here.

Crazy person talk there.

Baby stuff (from the only mom in the room....me).

Scared look in young peoples eyes. (Sheesh)

And you know what? I got a post idea from it.

Of course.

Some drunk person could benefit from my kid's diaper bag.

Or maybe I'll call it....The I'm Drunk and Need my Mommy Bag?

I don't know....think of some other names while I ramble on here.....

And now....items you, the drunk person, will find useful if you were stuck with my diaper bag.


When you've kicked back a keg or two, reality gets skewed a bit. So be prepared for those embarrassing moments when you've had that one too much for your bladder to handle.
Girls....I'm not sure this comes in thong options. I'll check and get back to you.


When drunk, people have been known to eat things on the way home or when we get home that don't quite agree with the tummy. Like the 7-11 nachos with extra cheese and chili from a can with a super sized Strawberry/Blue Freeze Slurpee. Use for AFTER poop area becomes a little rashy. (Or hey, whatever rash comes in the lower region area after a long night out. To each their own.) It works. Ask my husband.

Actually, don't ask my husband.



How would you NOT feel a little better wiping the left over vomit with this?
I advise sober person to pre-pour your choice of liquid hydration(gatorade or water). When sober turns into drunk, operating a sippy cup can be easy and less messy. All you have to do is hold on and drink.


Have I forgot anything bloggy pals?


26 ramblings of your own:

Heather, aka Jake's Mommy said...

The bib ... you know, for when you pass out and inevitably start drooling all over your top. Or when you pass out, and somebody else starts drooling on your top. Multi-faceted little bibs!

sandy said...

I agree with Heather, a bib for sure!

Mighty M said...

Ha ha! Perhaps a burp rag or some baby tylenol to help with the headache!

Christina said...

Yep, I agree. Add the bib.

Shorty said...

Perhaps a few of those little Cherrios containers filled with dry cereal or crackers...to help absorb some of the alcohol when the drunk person gets that no-so-great-feeling of, "Oh, crap.... I shouldn't have had that last one..."

WhisperingWriter said...

Very funny.

Maybe even include a rattle because I think a drunk person and a rattle would be humorous to watch. Then you could film it and post it on YouTube and get on The Today Show when it became really popular. The title of the video could be called: "When Drunk People Play With Rattles."

Tooj said...

This is a wonderful, helpful post! I hope that your work people get a chance to read it. Maybe post it on the employee bulletin board? :)

The Mama said...

I agree a bib and some baby tylenol for the headaches. LOL! This is HILARIOUS!

Elizabeth said...

Funny and so terribly true... :)

It's Raining on my Cupcakes said...

A change of clothes, just in case you happen to lose a piece of it here or there throughout the night. :)

kel said...

Yeah, I second the bib!!!!

Stereos and Souffles said...

How about a binkie (pacifier) to keep the drunk from saying something stupid.

debilyn said...

So flippin' funny!

And I agree with the change of clothes...for exactly the same reasons!

Cassie said...

Too funny! And I agree with previous posters... a bib and a change of clothes. At least one or the other! I don't know how many times I got drunk and spilled my drink all over my shirt...

K said...

Maybe some snacks?

Excellent plan for a drunk bag.

ClaireMontgomeryMD said...

i'm a fairly new reader/commenter so feel free to block me due to vulgarity but . . . some girls need a paci so as not to suck on 'something else'. (there - cleaned it up)

Kim said...

Dang! I'm too late to the party. All the good stuff's been taken.

Fiauna said...

I agree; you forgot the bib. What else can I say? Just wow.

Kalei said...

baby toy car keys. that way they won't drive drunk home after you have switched their set of keys with the baby's!

Housewife Savant said...

I agree that a pacifier would be useful - stop a crying jag perhaps?

Muppet Soul said...

This reminds me of a question I had after reading an article the other day...

When I'm a Mom, Miss Rambler, do I have to call it a sippy cup?

And do I have to use the word "poopy"?

Your bag scares me to the point of needing a drink. It's a vicious cycle.

M said...

Ditto on the bib and cloth diaper/burp rag.

Goldfish crackers fo sho!!

You know at 3 a.m. those little babies would be heavenly :)

The Caretaker said...

I gave you The Lemonade Stand Award. http://www.inthelifeofptsd.blogspot.com

Ronnica said...

Such a multi-purpose bag!

B+Bs mom said...

Maybe throw in one of those baby cell phones so no drunk dialing occurs!!

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